No Place Like Home
Just like we discover our true family once we leave home, we also discover our true home.
My family moved around when I was little - our first move out of my Northern Californian birthplace when I was three - and when it finally came time for me to strike out on my own, I moved far away from my native California and settled into the DC environs to make a home. Arlington, Virginia has been my home for the last twenty four years and it has been a good home for my family and my business. My spirit? Not so much. I have found and devoted my energy to a church there, ensured it was a comfortable space for my children and community to find comfort in, but my own spiritual journey has continued on its own path, looking for home.
Many times over the years, I've had urges and desires to move back to the San Francisco area. They intensified when my husband and kids fell in love with the Pacific shores and traveled with me along the jagged, lush shores of California's northern beaches, crawling around looking for rocks and stepping around surging surf to spot tidepool treasures. But the time has never been right and the list of "why nots" always far outweighs the "whys" for calling Northern California “home”.
Many times on our trips I've sat alone on the ocean's edge and wept - not out of sadness but out of joy for the sheer, raw energy of the land that my body, mind and soul knows is where I belong. I've wept because I feel so connected to mother earth and God when I sit at the ocean’s edge that I can't contain the intensity of my love of this land where the water and air and coastline come together in roughly gorgeous harmony for all the senses to enjoy. "Someday," I say to myself, "if I’m incredibly lucky, I’ll find a way to live some of my life here again." And then I get back on a plane and fly “home.”
And all this seems odd because until the last couple of years, I’ve hardly known a soul in California. My family all left decades ago and the majority of my close friends moved also. I thought I was drawn to the land for its beauty and energy.
A few times, usually in the sticky heat of a Washington summer, I've questioned why I've had to live so long away from the place that gives me such joy be simply being there and breathing the air. I don't feel "punished," because our life in DC is really pretty fantastic, and the seasons are nice, and the schools are good, and my career has thrived. But I have still succumbed to wondering about my wandering so far from “home”.
This weekend I came to San Francisco on a business/pleasure trip and found the answer to what calls me back. And it turned out that it had very little to do with the land at all, and everything to do with my inner landscape and the spiritual journey I've been on. This weekend I spent a few days with the driving forces behind Owning Pink. Lissa Rankin extended her lovely home in Muir Beach to me and invited many others she has found community with. Some were new to me, some had already become old friends in spirit (thank you, Internet!). We came together over food and friendship and began to talk about our dreams – for ourselves, for each other, for the world. We shared what each of us hoped for Owning Pink, what we had to offer it, what it gave us. And in the sharing something amazing began to take shape.
We began to speak of Owning Pink as a business that will serve Divine Purpose and uplift our community as it uplifts us. We spoke of “Pink” as Divine Love and women as the gateway for the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine to walk through into co-creating a more beautiful world. We spoke of helping each other along on our personal journeys, of helping people heal them simply by “seeing” them as the beautiful souls we all are. We all accepted responsibility for our part in making this happen and vowed to support each other in the effort. It was the most unusual business meeting I’ve ever attended and it was also the most important.
I realized as we talked of business and dreams, that others “saw” me and allowed me to “see” them absent cynicism and negativity and all the “why nots”. We gave ourselves permission to imagine our success and see it in what is already taking shape. My spirit lifted as we talked and I saw that we each brought special gifts and perspectives to this conversation as the business issues and the higher goals wove themselves together in our discussion. But the most precious moment was when I saw how my own personal gifts and skills – business knowledge and spiritual awareness – fit into this lovely mosaic of building intention like a hand slips into a soft, supple glove.
And suddenly I understood that I was truly home. On the land, in my heart and in my spiritual tribe, I had come home from the dessert to be welcomed with open arms; the gifts I had collected without knowing who they would be given to were graciously accepted; and I wept yet again.
Now there is no doubt in my mind that Northern California and Owning Pink are my home in truth. The logistics of locating my body and career here are likely to work their way out but even if they don’t, I know where home is and carry it with me always and forever (thank you, Internet, again!). This has been a fantastic year for me so far, finding both my purpose and my home. I can't wait to see what's next.
Thank you Lissa, for following your own true path where it has led you, and for including me in your journey. Thank you for calling me home.
Categories: living out loud. 2010,spirit,living out loud,love,travel,Flowing,work
Tags: love real life inspiration home california gratitude purpose travel
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Dear Dana,
One of your tears along with many of your sentiments landed on my cheek and the floodgates are flung open and emotion flows down my neck and into the fabric of my t-shirt at this very moment.
I am new to Owning Pink (thanks to your invitation)and haven't been nearly as active and responsive as I would have liked. However; I am convinced of the power, magnitude, and impact it has on those fortunate enough to have found their way in. You are essential to how the site moves us, and since I have a slight "in" (wink) with you, am hungry for the inside info on what Owning Pink has designed for its future.
The interwoven story of your beginnings as a West Coast Girl, reach me as potently as your experience with Lissa and the Pinks. When rubbered landing gear hits the tarmac of SeaTac runway, immediately, "home", for me, kicks in like an elite Thai boxer, striking one for the King.
I was there, close enough to where you all were, with my Dad, on the farm in Roy, WA, which draws me home ever so dearly and so often.
After wandering the planet since age 25, and spending the last 15 years here, like you, having a full life, raising a thriving, purposeful family, and twlighting one career... grasping for another, I know well where I should be. The Pacific Northwest, the farm and its bountiful natural wonder, and my first family, my dad have a hold on me.
As you suggest, its not a choke-hold on any account. Life, here equals fulfillment of one kind, life there, the intuitive call of my wild beginnings, yet both exist within me and cause me to BE, NOW, and to who I have yet to become.
My dreamy tear filled eyes urge me to continue responding, and I have the words, but the reality of the hour, and the girls' growling tummies when they get home, bid me to take up my happy comments for another time.
So very moved by you.
We will see each other soon.
Mary
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Mary
Oh big HUG! I Know you Know of what I speak and it warms my heart not to be so alone in that longing and love for a place that holds your spirit. So much to share and talk about. Thank you for your wonderful and touching words. Tears are not always sad. I look forward to when we can see each other in person again. Give your "little" ones hugs for me. My "little one" is looking forward to the weekend with you all. Give him a hug for me?
Love, Light and Blessings
~Dana
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Dear Dana,
What an gorgeous, eloquent post. You have shown us that "home" lies within our spirit and in our heart. Lovely. Just lovely!
Fred
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Fred
Thanks
Thanks for sharing your warm light here with me.
Love, Light and Blessings
~Dana
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Wow, Dana... I felt your soul in this post. Thank you for sharing your love and light... it brought tears...
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Kristen
Thank you for seeing my soul. And thank you for your light. How else will the world change unless we change with it?
Love, Light and Blessings
~Dana
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I feel similarly about California. I've got two trips planned there for spirituality seminars over the next few months and I'm yearning for some healing CA energy.
I love that pic of you and Lissa, so much joy and love just flow right out of it! You are an amazing person and I'm so excited to see where you guys take OP. Hugs and love to you, friend! Thanks for sharing your beautiful story.
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Erin
Thank you! Yes, CA is a healing place. My childhood was messy enough that I often wonder why I don't hate it here, but I've finally come to the conclusion that the place itself just heals me when I'm here. It's that powerful.
Isn't that a great picture? I love it too. Lissa is amazing in person and I just feel so privelaged to be working with her so closely.. I'm excited too!
And btw, I STILL want to figure out that Pink Work stuff!
Love and Light
~Dana
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Wonderful post Dana. It sounds like such a moving experience. I am so happy for you that you have found your home. I take great inspiration from watching the journey of such wonderful women like you and Lissa.
It goes without saying that I am quite jealous of your time there. It's been far too long since I have been in CA (ok only a year, but still too long).
Enjoy the rest of your stay.
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Laurie
I'll bring a whiff of it back with me so when we meet next you can breathe the beauty again... I SO know the feeling of missing this place. And all our journeys are worth watching. Yours inspires me too!
Love!
Dana
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